Life as I find it

I came across this bizarre (yeah, that’s my favourite word) situation with poor Vlad, who like many of us here is a blogger writing about his interests and writing paid posts as opportunities arise. Now, this situation seems to have a lot of angles to it, but from what I basically understand….

This Vlad accepts to write a review about ePerks. From all that I have heard, this was a positive review (I can’t find it). However, comments on his post were very strongly negative. These had some intervention attempts by an anonymous commenter and the whole thing heated up.

Well… he addressed that exploding comments situation inviting an exploration into ePerks in a follow up post. The company itself did what ….. they shouldn’t have, if they valued their reputation. They threatened him. Now, for a company that buys reviews from bloggers to build thier reputation, to threaten a blogger for writing - and from what I hear, Vlad did not criticize the company until then - is like having an axe… don’t know where to put it… look…. there’s my foot…..

This is basically what happened. This was followed by an explosion of bloggers speaking up in support of Vlad (like I am doing right now). It really is no longer the issue what the services of ePerks are anymore. The issue now is their image. For a company paying to get reviewed, it sure has more unpaid reviews now, and none of them that they would want to pay for. I doubt if any of them include a link either. Some examples would be:

• iHype & ePerks - How To Kill A Startup by Andy Beard really looks into this situation from many angles. I found this post really helpful in understanding the situation.
• Presumed Guilty Until Proven Innocent by Aaron Walls speaks briefly about the right to free speech and the risk involved in mass acquiring of links without building relationships.
• Memo to ePerks.com: You idiots! Trying to censor a real estate weblogger is a poor way to defend your reputation — such as it is… by Greg Swann along with some other posts, all equally “defending” the right to free speech.
• There are many others who have got angry about this whole thing.

My perspectives on this:

• ePerks: This was an incredibly stupid thing to do, which I guess I don’t need to tell you by now. If you pay for a review, you get a review. The end. If you don’t like the comments, go camp out on the comments form, address the commenters (which you did). However, threatening a blogger for something he did not do….. You don’t have a leg to stand on. Opinions are opinions. The smart thing would have been to acknowledge the comments, apologize if anyone had suffered inconvenience, and invite them into a dialogue to resolve the issue, or make your stand clear. This could have got you a few free nice posts, for graceful handling. Now, it is just about digging yourself deeper and deeper, and the damage is really beyond control. How many bloggers can you sue? Do they even live within your reach to do that? Really, I see no happy solution for you beyond a massive apology, an attitude shift and big payments to bloggers for damage control.
• Vlad: I see you doing what you were supposed to be doing initially, but I wonder if you really understood the imact of your second post. While it certainly invited investigation and feedback, I felt that it enouraged making extreme stands, which is good to get lots of comments, but really, how important are comments - at what price?). Though I don’t see how it would have changed anything considering the nature of comments that followed.
• Common man: I understand your frustration at being scammed and applaud your sharing of your experience so that it may serve to warn possible victims, or provide feedback to ePerks, if they do attempt a change of attitude.
• The blogging community: I expereince this rush of support for Vlad as one of the strengths of this platform, and the community. I don’t know Vlad at all, but being in his situation (having written about a scam earlier) I know that it is a risk that we get unnecessarily caught up in legal hassles. While we know that there is something inside us that wants us to stand for the truth, it is equally difficult to face legal feed regardless of who will win eventually. I don’t know most of you personally, but this act of solidarity makes me feel that there is support anyway if we stand for our beliefs.
• For me: The truth needs to be told. If I can do it in a way that facilitates resolution, superb. If not, confrontation it is!

You could wait to become lucky one day, or get lucky right now. How do you go about doing it?

1. Find something to get lucky about
2. Find something to appreciate
3. Find something to criticize
4. Figure out an investment (no matter how small)
5. Plan the result of that investment - however modest
6. Invest money and/or in it
7. Make sure that your investment yields results
8. Find ways to enhance them
9. Start looking for other investments that could strengthen this one
10. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Simple as this sounds, this is the mantra to follow for no matter how small or large the luck you want.

Try it on something simple first. As long as you take the rules no 7,8 and 9 seriously, there is no way you can be unlucky. Fate will conspire to make things happen.

And no, this is not something esoteric, it is simply the perspective shift that happens with involvement in something.

Too many people give up easy. Perseverance is the key to achieving anything.

What use is a webmaster who makes a site and sits passive? He is not a webmaster - he is a designer and the poor site is an orphan. What use is a climber who doesn’t practice?

It is a fantasy that we will be able to “maintain” our current success. Performance and results like everything in life are ever changing. You can’t maintain them, because they are not snapshots to be frozen. What you can do is make efforts that bring a sense of the results being sustained. The sustaining is a new challenge.

Many people don’t understand this, or maybe they don’t want to understand. Because, if they do, they will have to actively make efforts and bear their responsibility infinitely.

It is not as bad as it sounds. Its worse!

The thing with getting that zing out of life is not “maintaining” and “sustaining” and such insipid words. It is exploring! Going beyond boundaries, current abilities and all that we know, to know new things.

It is a shift in our attitudes from passively suffering what life doles out to actively pursuing what we want. Once that shift is made, you will never find yourself worried about sustaining performance, because you will know what you did today is going to be insignificant before what you are going to do tomorrow. No doubts, no uncertainties.

If you are certain of your commitment to excellence, you will find yourself completely accepting that each new moment brings a learning and development curve.

A friend of mine died recently in a freak climbing accident. A lively, intelligent person, with great and diverse talent, he was well respected at work, among friends and fellow climbers alike. He was full of initiative ideas and empathy. A truly perfect person to have with you anywhere.

He has left behind a wife, a two year old daughter and aged parents. He was the sole bread-winner of their family, and they lived comfortably as he earned very well.

The family, now is in deep financial circumstances, as to add to their emotional loss, they now have no source of livelihood. My friend, while earning a good income, had failed to provide adequate income, and had also taken a big loan for their ner home.

I look at their situation and learn my lesson. No one here comes with a guaranteed life-span. I am going to start saving, plan insurance, minimise outstanding credit, avoid expensive loans, and in general be well planned in my finances so that if an unforeseen disaster strikes, my family may at least be secure in an economical sense.

This is something outdoor professionals rarely consider. Leading hand to mouth lives becomes a way of life. The little extra money they have goes on something or the other they want.

The sad truth is that outdoor adventure instructors have very few guarantees in life. Their interests make very few non menial careers suitable for them in case of an accident that limits their abilities. Accidents are entirely possible in this profession and pay scales are low.

What is needed with our community is the interest in managing life, money, relationships and then using up what spare resources they have.

What do we mean by authenticity? It is simply being transparent, sharing your state of being without camoflages and masks. Of having the courage to be, and trusting those with you enough to want them to know it.

Many a times, on programmes, the minute this word comes up, there is a whole barrage of people with objections. Doubts, problems… how it is impossible in todays world. What I see happening is that the subject is important to so many people in the group, which is how all these voices suddenly come up. I also see that there is a lot of fear of consequences if we show our true selves. If it is not liked, it leaves us in a very unhappy and vulnerable situation.

There is not much I can say that can change this. It is true. What I can share is the things that overcome this fear for me.

• I enjoy exploring life. I don’t wish to spend energy in hiding myself constantly.
• If I hide, I am operating from an assumption that what I could reveal will not be liked - this may not be true at all.
• I see strength in authenticity - no one is perfect. It is those with strength to face themselves who can see their imperfections and acknowledge them.
• I see inclusion of the others around me in authenticity. When I open myself to them, I include them in what is happening with me.
• When I am authentic and the consequences are difficult to bear, I can work to explore and change myself and situations. If I hide, I remain at their mercy forever, because I will never change them.

So how does being authentic help us:

• More energy for things we find worthwhile
• My being authentic sends a message to people that they can be themselves with me too
• Relationships based on reality rather than pretenses
• Relationships where imperfections are accepted and issues can be addressed rather than silent resentments
• The power of being exactly what we are without fear

Not worth it?